My Sweet Baby

My little man. Precious little butterball. I miss him so much. My heart hurts so bad. For two months, I kissed those sweet cheeks and held him tight. I hope the memory of that feeling can carry me through until I see him in heaven one day.

The words to this song kind of summarize our feelings...our hearts are raw. But, we know that, in Christ, there are no goodbyes. Love you all...

"Homesick" by Mercy Me

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times

And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you

But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry

Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways

The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know

But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same

Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbye

And in Christ, there is no end

So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have

To see you again

To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Back in the old hometown...

And it feels good. With my best friend Em...just sitting next to her in the white chair in her living room. A computer in each of our laps...just hanging out. She was supposed to be in bed a while ago because she has to work tomorrow, but she is still right here next to me. And that is just fine with me. I love her...she will throw up when she reads this. All that mushy stuff is not her cup of tea. But, the great thing is that I know she loves me too. She took me (and Hubs and K-Bel) to my favorite eatery tonight for dinner. And...she snuck a toy for K-bel out of my basket at Target because she wanted to buy it for her. She is sitting here making me cool CDs to listen to while we are in the hospital this week. It is just good. I love it and well....I really miss it. We used to live just a couple of streets away from each other...now, many miles separate us. And when I think about it, that makes me very sad. But, tonight I am just loving this time...knowing that no matter what, we are just us. She knows me. She knows the real me. And that is a gift. We could use prayers this week. Hubs and I are hanging with K-bel and the grandmas are hanging with the other kiddos. I am sure things will go smoothly, but it will be hard to be apart during this holiday week when we could be having such quality time together. We should all be together for Thanksgiving, so I am thankful for that.

I got to see one of my other very favorite people in the world tonight. Talk about missing somebody. One of the hardest things has been not walking out of my front door and chatting with her while our kiddos run around like crazy between our yards. I miss picking my kids up from her house (the way too many times that she so graciously helped me out), thanking her, and hearing her say, 'anytime'. I really do have a lot to be thankful...that's for sure. Ya'll have a great week...

Out of the mouths...

This babe is just growing up on me. She has become much more quiet and mature over the past few months. And she talks to me about a lot of things. And even though she is a rather intelligent child, she is rather ditsy sometimes. After nap yesterday, K says "Mommy, you saw that I couldn't open the door, right? That's because you crapped the door too hard." Yikes, but I knew exactly what she was trying to say. She was telling me that I had CRACKED the door too much...like shut it too hard, and she had a hard time getting it open.

Then, on Saturday after our soccer game, I was asking the kids which they prefer...indoor or outdoor soccer. C can make an educated decision about it because he has played both. He said indoor, but K said, "I like indoor soccer better because Dora is my favorite. That is a great movie right?" Hahahahaha....get it? Indoor--Dora...I just can't figure out the connection. Dora plays indoor soccer? Hmmm...funny girl.

The rest of the crew is doing well. We are getting excited about seeing our family this weekend...that is always fun!

This girl....

I am telling you...she is hilarious. If you lose sight of her, it won't be long until she is into something. And it is very likely she has found a tasty treat of some kind. This is from a while back, it is just so cute that I can't resist. And my heart is loving her overtime right now because we have a surgery date set...for Monday! Eeeek!

Whoever liked candy corn anyway? Apparently one person in our family does. :)

It's fall ya'll...

Today is a GORGEOUS day. It is absolutely beautiful outside. After church and lunch, we headed out to play outside. C is having a birthday soon and one of my very favorite things is having birthday parties for my kiddos (just ask around...some people think I might be a little crazy :). C has been saying for a year that he wants to have a carnival party, so this mommy has some prepping to do. Today, we started on our booths and games by spray painting some wood and cardboard. Hopefully (even though we have lots going on with K-bel) the carnival will start coming together soon. I am really excited and I know C is too. Here he is doing some bounce house preparation with his buddy that came to visit last weekend...

We are also getting excited about seeing some of our favorite people this weekend. Since the best coach in the world's team won their football game on Friday night, we might have a crowd this weekend to cheer on Hubs. That will be awesome...

All in all, things are good here. The weather is changing...it feels like fall...Thanksgiving is coming and we have so much to be thankful for....then C-man's carnival....and then we get to celebrate the birth of the One who would live a completely human although sinless life just to die later for our sinful souls. Indeed, this IS a great time of year....in fact, I think it must be my favorite. Ya'll have a great week.

Bummed...

Sorry (mom :) for the delay in posting. I have not been myself in the past week or so...because I am thinking about this pumpkin...

eating like this all of the time...

and not gaining any weight. This past week has been a bit of a roller coaster for me. I am struggling with continuing the fight for K-bel to grow or moving forward with having a G-button (direct line to her stomach) surgically placed in order to provide her with extra calories. I am normally not a person to struggle with things, but for some reason I have taken all of this pretty hard. Life will go on and my baby will be ok, but honestly I don't really care for either of our options. And I am just afraid of the unknown. I will tell you one thing...she is hard headed and tough. I have always wondered about that spunk and sass; now I know maybe this is why she has it...to get through the tough times.

On other notes, we are all still hanging in there. Baby T is gaining the weight that little K-bel is not. Man...he is a chub. Every single one of his chins are adorable. Hubs is still the best coach ever and his team is playing their first playoff game tomorrow night. We are so excited for him and he is a nervous wreck. Ya'll have a great weekend...

Happy Halloweeny!!

This year was a little tricky and treaty...five kids...five years old and under. Costumes, candy, fall festival, trick or treating...I'd say we had fun! C was Commander Cody (a clone trooper from Star Wars), K was an Angel (costume completely homemade--thanks Jennifer and Becky), F a pumpkin, K-bel a Tulip Fairy (whatever that is :), and Baby T was a Jack-O-Lantern (simply a onesie). Our church in the new hometown, which is significantly smaller than the old hometown, had a fall festival. I can honestly say that I feel like over half of the new hometown was in the church for some fall festivities. Thankfully, a sweet friend saw me walk in the door Hubs-less (football season, remember?) and helped with a couple of the girls. K gets a little overwhelmed and slightly withdrawn in big crowds and F, well F just can hardly handle all the stimulation, so after a few booth stops for candy, Gigi (our sweet friend) took them outside to sit and eat cupcakes. THAT was a lifesaver. Friday night, our sweet Gigi came over since I was obviously Hubs-less again (football game night) and we took the munchkins to a few houses to trick or treat. They were very spoiled with lots of goodies because we did some selective trick or treating. :) At one house, they were given gift bags with candy and a movie in them...each kiddo was given one! Crazy, but sweet.

This next week of blogging is going to have to include some halloween week pictures as well...pumpkin carving and boo cookies for starters! :)

Oh...and just so you know; here is what happens when you don't give this baby what she wants...

Surely he feels....

Like a lucky duck.

Yo.

Introducing Mr. Bottle Bones...

We had so much fun making Mr. Bottle Bones. The project took a wee bit longer than planned, so out came the camera for some entertainment. We used 9 old milk cartons to construct the boney dude. Hubs used a knife to make his face...it was kinda scary looking so we opted for scissors for the rest of the project. Any family resemblance here?

K-bel and F were playing so sweetly in the playroom during the bottle bones assembly. That was definitely a Kodak (well, Nikon really) moment. It was really cute...they are both starting to say, 'cheeeeese' anytime I have my camera out.

Once Pops got here for the weekend, he intervened and finished up Mr. Bottle Bones with some help. All in all, we had a great time. The kids have talked about him all week as he hangs outside on our back porch. F loves to say his name the best...'mommy, dats (that's) miiiister bones'. Ha...she really is a cute little pumpkin (oh...and more on that pumpkin stuff to come soon).

Happy Birthday Pops...

Today is my dad's (technically stepdad's) birthday. There might not be a luckier little girl in the world as me. I always tell people that I have two dads. Thankfully, both of them get along like champs. And my real dad has thanked Pops several times for loving me and raising me the way that he did. That has been such a great gift to me. Both of them EVEN walked me down the aisle together.

Anyway...today is his special day. He is fifty something, but not quite sixty. He is probably the most hard working person I know (maybe besides Hubs). His heart...pure gold. His voice so soft and wise, but strong if absolutely necessary. Ask him how many times he disciplined me if you have the chance...the answer...exactly 1/2. I was so broken hearted that he was even having to talk to me about something that I told him to stop and leave me alone. He knew he made his point and it never happened again. :)

I have so many memories. I can't even list them all. I have two favorite to this very day. Each and every Sunday after church, Pops and I would run into the house and change our clothes real quick. We would play and play and play basketball in the driveway for as long as we could get away with it (Sunday was cleaning day ya know :). We truly enjoyed being together...we were best buds. Another favorite...as a young kiddo, I would holler for Pops after I had gone to bed. I would tell him that I wanted my back scratched and he would sit by my bed forever and scratch my back. The catch...he was so tired himself that he would start nodding off to sleep. So, I would jerk or move or something to wake him up and he would keep going. God love him...

Cause I sure do.

Happy birthday Pops...you are incredible. We will always be the best of buds. I love you! (and...you are an incredible grandfather....but I just wanted to write about us! :)